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Lover Boy Wails, On How The Devil Ruined His Day And Put Him In Severe Pains

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So their is this babe that have been crushing on for a while, we are very close but unto say she get boyfriend wey be correct bad boy, she no fit give me face. So around 12 am this morning I was going through her status and she was sounding like she’s heartbroken, na so I try my luck message am then boom like a dream come true she asked if I go dey house for morning for my mind I be like: wetin my masquerade dey do wey him no go fit twerk for morning( it’s a Yoruba Adage implying what am I doing wey I no go get time).

I couldn’t sleep I had to take care of my dirty filthy room and arrange everything, made my ??TV subscription so she can watch Bbn and be comfortable and made sure everything was set.

Ko ko ko I heard the knock on my door while I was snoring then I opened the door and there she was the most beautiful thing I ever set my eyes on in a while she came in and she didn’t even sit on chair she just laid down on the bed waiting for me to devour her. I guess the reason she came so early was because she was desperate for a break up sex to move on. As I inched closer to her she told me to go and brush and then after that I should get her something to eat she needs the energy. Chaiii I don die today go maaaaaaaad.

I brushed my teeth and decided to cook for her that was when gbege started I tried putting on my gas and boom gas don finish oh Lord why today. My mind suggested I jejely go and get her fried rice and chicken but the ijebu inside me didn’t agree I was like why I go carry 3k buy food for girl I will rather use the 3k to fill my gas.

That’s how I carry the heavy gas o. As I reach estate gate everybody just dey look me with surprise because e be like say na only me no get car for the estate so they were suprised seeing someone carrying the heavy gas. Unfortunately the person filling the gas never come ” such a lazy fellow he never reach shop by 8″ I uttered to myself. That’s how I carried bike and started searching for where to fill gas then I spotted one place, gave the bikeman overcharged 100 naira . Na so they call price of filling the gas 6000 chaiii I open mouth but I had to fill it.

As the guy dey fill am na so the thing stop ooo chaiii which kind wahala be this again, aboki tell me say ” “oga no ves gas don finish make I call my ooga to bring gas from the second shop” that’s how we waited ooo and filled the gas. It was time to pay na so them say they no get pos and I no carry phone comot for house. I had to start going from pillar to post as POS people plenty reach I no see any one. na so I enter bike go the nearest bank o. I tried withdrawing money network no dey I had to wait, I saw POS but I already wasted bike money and to waste another 200 go hard me so I waited and after 15mins there was network na so I collect 10k. It was now after 10 it would be too late to cook for the babe again. My mind told me to go and buy the fried rice and chicken but spending another 3k on food go too much again so I had to look for a low budget fast food joint to get 1000 fried rice and chicken. I saw a decent place only for them to tell me it’s not ready so I waited till 11 e still never ready. Last last I had to go to the place I was avoiding I bought fried rice 400 jollof 400 salad 300 chicken 1200 and coke 200 making 2500 with pain I took bike of 300 back home.


That’s how we reach estate gate na so another wahala start ooo the bike man no get 200 change na so we begin find common 200 for like 30 minutes that’s how I saw the babe coming outside the estate gate her eyes don red she no even gree make I talk anything.

I just quickly gave her the fried rice and chicken and told the bike man to carry her with the remaining 200 naira change. As I beckoned to carry my gas cylinder na so she call her boyfriend estate for the bikeman. I knew her boyfriend estate because I met her there through a friend of mine that stay in the same shared apartment with the boyfriend.

That’s how I rushed inside and relaxed a bit then I called my friend to ask if the babe came to their building. Na so my guy confirm am o that she’s in the guys room that she even brought fried rice and chicken and they are both kissing and enjoying the food.

As I am writing this am rolling on the floor in severe pains. Song wey I sing no blow. I come say make I blow babe again I still no see am do. Which kind life I come like this chaiii

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